"Don't talk back to me, alright?!" - Randy Johnson

This morning I have come across a number of news stories, etc. and I have violated my own rule about not reading the comments. Already this morning, I have seen comments psychoanalyzing the author of an article, questioning the author's bias in a completely apolitical piece, and arguing with Dear Abby! What is going on?!

Actually, I know the problem. People have very much bought into the foolishness of the current media obsession known as "join the conversation." Actually, don't. I don't want to read about your problems, politics, or opinions when I'm reading the sports or news or an advice column. If you want to write about it on your Facebook, or Tweet about it, or even blog about it (I know: who does that anymore?) then go right ahead. That's why those forums exist. Unfortunately, the comments section of most every website is a cesspool of stupidity, in which you can find the rhetorical equivalent of "You're a big dummyhead!" "I know you are but what am I?" played out for public consumption.

If you want to read opinions, turn to the editorial section of a newspaper or website. But do everyone a favor: don't "join the conversation."

Thanks for reading. I'll try to do better next time.

Passing of a friend

Today is coming to a close in an unexpected fashion, with the news that an old friend has passed away.  Mike Cole was one of the first people I remember knowing after I moved to Show Low when I was 6 years old. We were friends throughout our time in school, especially when were in CCD and CYO together.  Along with Joe Prust, we were the Three Catholic Musketeers for years.  I remember spending the night at Mike's house a few times. We annoyed his sister, Tricia, and wandered around Fools Hollow, even at night.  I wasn't as close to Mike as I was years ago, and I was never as close as many of my old Show Low friends were, but Mike was my friend.

I have lost family members, even recently.  I have lost people I looked up to and even idolized. I have been there with friends when they were grieving their losses, and I have watched as my role models growing up have left this life. This is the first time anyone I ever considered a close friend has passed away, however. I can't say I am dealing with it well, although there isn't a particularly good way to deal with loss. I miss the people I grew up with, I miss the life I lived when Mike and I were friends, and tonight I am missing Michael James Cole. Rest in peace, my friend.

Religion and baseball. Really.

Watching the Diamondbacks game tonight and I saw a really bad call, which is having some impact on the game.  I'm not sure why, but it suddenly struck me that the situation was distressingly similar to some issues with the church.  It really isn't even much of a stretch.

One of the things that bugs me most about baseball is its reluctance to just make changes that need to be made.  They knew about steroids for years before they addressed the problem.  They complain about the length of games but they won't enforce rules to speed up the game.  And, in the most glaring example, they won't address the issue of replay in a timely manner.  Umpires are not allowed to review anything outside a very narrow band of calls.  The review tonight would have taken ten seconds, but the powers that be are more interested in following some rule than they are in getting it right.

This is where the similarity to the church comes in.  Too many church leaders are interested in following some rule about who can get married, etc., and they are totally disinterested in doing what is right for actual human people.  This bothers me more daily in two of my favorite institutions: Major League Baseball and the church.

Thanks for reading.  I'll try to do better next time.

Pure Parental Happiness

Let me start by saying for the record that The Princess Bride is my favorite movie of all time.  I have seen it dozens of time and it is the only movie I can think of that I could finish watching and immediately restart to watch again.  Katie and I both quote from it on a daily basis, often leaving the children rolling their eyes.

Despite all of this, somehow my kids had never seen it before. Dermot had expressed some interest, but we just never got around to it.  So tonight, when we had an unclaimed block of time for a change, we decided to fill it with The Princess Bride.  It was the best decision of the year.  At every kissing scene, Kieran echoed the Fred Savage character: "Oh gross! They're kissing!" and other exclamations of mock horror.  Meanwhile, Dermot began quoting the movie as it continued, in the manner of 10-year-olds everywhere.  The best part is that it matched the famously quotable lines:

• "Anybody want a peanut?"
• "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."
• "Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father; prepare to die."
• "Mawidge, the bwessed awangement..."
• "You'd make a wonderful Dread Pirate Roberts."

He even did them with the appropriate accents.

I noticed as the movie progressed that whenever I looked over at him and he was laughing and loving the movie, I got a little choked up.  Let me be clear: I am extremely proud of my kids.  Kieran is a funny little spark plug.  I can't wait for Little League because he gets so into it.  Dermot is a budding scientist and writer. (I'm envisioning the next Malcolm Gladwell.)  In fact, tomorrow Dermot will be competing in the Coconino County Spelling Bee as the two-time reigning Knoles Elementary Spelling Bee champion.  Yet, somehow, I felt myself getting a lump in my throat over my kids' joy at a movie.

Maybe it's silly, but I can't help it.  Tonight, watching that movie with them, I was as happy as I've ever been as a parent.  I will apologize for being sappy, goofy, distractible, myopic, and overweight, but I won't apologize for what happened tonight.  For me, that's the good stuff.

Thanks for reading. I'll try to do better next time.

Dumb people and other love songs

Haven't done this in awhile. I hope I remember how...

I'll be trying to post my more inflammatory statements through the blog so I piss off fewer people.

Have you noticed that Joe Arpaio does more ridiculous things as the federal government gets closer to nailing him for his racial profiling and incompetence at his job? Also, most of his campaign money comes from outside the state.

You would have to be completely lost in your own paranoid brand of unreality to believe - even for a minute - Rush Limbaugh's statements that the President of the United States actually hates the country he runs. Pretty stupid.  I can respect people who disagree with the policies of the president or others on my side of the political divide, but as soon as you say actively stupid things, I can't respect you anymore. (To be clear: "I don't think the president is doing a very good job turning around the economy" is fine. I disagree, but I can understand. When you say "I wish this president would learn how to be an American," you have crossed the line into stupidity.)

Don't read the comments sections of any online posting. Most of the time the people who respond to online articles have been required to fail an IQ test before being allowed to post. Also, don't comment on news articles. Please.

I can't wait to stay on the North Rim.

I hope California is foggy when we get there.

I was worried about Katie's high school reunion, but it was fun. I didn't know those folks very well, but it was still great to reminisce over the shared experiences we did have together.

I love my job, but I wish the people I feel best about working with would stop leaving. Not only am I losing out on the chance to collaborate with some terrific educators, but I'm starting to get a complex! This time, I still have a couple teachers left to work with, but just by the skin of their teeth.

I'm not leaving the Catholic Church, but I'm not very happy with the state of affairs therein.

I'm really glad that I finally talked Katie into getting a Facebook account.

And speaking of Katie, I am the luckiest man on earth. Not only do I get to spend every day with a couple of terrific little boys, I also get to look at the best person I have ever known as I fall asleep every night. Her strength and beauty–in every aspect of her life–inspire me every day.

I wish I could have been at my baby cousin's wedding. As it turns out, she isn't a baby anymore. In fact she's a doctor, but I still wish I could have gone to her wedding.

I guess the Diamondbacks are going to trade Justin Upton. I have no idea why they would do that. And on the subject of the D-backs, where the heck is Daron Sutton?!

Thanks for reading. I'll try to do better next time.

Just tired

Maybe I'm over-tired, at home with a sick 4 year old, but I'm a little emotional today. I watched Gabby Giffords resign today. I heard the things her colleagues, both Republican and Democrat, said about her. I want to believe those things.

When I was a little kid I would say, like all little kids, that I wanted to be President someday.  I don't actually want that anymore, but I want to believe that the people who represent us are good people.  I want real people who are doing what they think is right to run this country, not people who will say one thing one day, and change their tune to deny an opponent a victory.  I want to believe that the tears I saw on the floor of the House of Representatives were real.  When I see John Boehner, I don't want to think he's prepping a photo-op.  The system as it stands now makes it hard for me to believe those things, though.

I haven't stopped believing in the things I have always believed in.  I am still a ridiculously left of center liberal.  I just don't want to be a bomb-thrower anymore. If someone I know believes something from the right, I don't want to think they are bad; I just want to think they are simply wrong.  Watching the State of the Union and Rep. Giffords resignation, I got a brief reminder of how it felt when I could believe passionately without hating passionately.  

I don't want to believe that all Republicans are Rush Limbaugh or Ann Coulter or Russell Pearce or Joe Arpaio and I don't want to be the liberal equivalent of those hate-mongers.  I fear that is precisely what I have become.  I want to remember that you can disagree with someone and still believe them to be a fine person. And I want to remember that even people I generally agree with and admire make poor decisions or have bad ideas; I don't automatically oppose you because I disagree with you. 

I need to believe that people are basically good, whether I agree with them or not.  I'm tired of being cynical.  I am tired of being angry.  I am tired of pointing fingers.  I am tired of my thin skin.  I am tired of the political person I have become.  I can't change the system, and I can't change what others think or say about me, but I can change me and that is enough.

Thanks for reading. I'll try to do better next time.

A love letter to NPR

One of the best parts of my day is just after I wake up.  I wander to the kitchen and make some coffee with the radio tuned to 91.7 FM.  That's our local NPR station.  I love getting my brain going with such quality information.

NPR does good reporting on so many things.  I have learned about new psychological research, which I included in my class. I have learned about scientific breakthroughs, world politics, artists, films, books and writers.  I read things I would never have read, watch things I would never have watched, and even eat things I would never have eaten. Case in point: a number of years ago, I tried the infamous Pepto-Bismol pink cranberry relish that Susan Stamberg extols each year at this time. It has become a staple of our Thanksgiving feast.

This morning I heard Tina Brown of The Daily Beast/ Newsweek on Morning Edition. She talked about articles by Peggy Noonan and David Brooks, two well-known Republican writers.  Most of you who will read this know that I am firmly on the opposite side of the aisle.  However, because of the appearance on NPR, I was willing to give them a chance.  In fact, I read both columns and they are great, not just good.  I had to think and accommodate new information and opinions.  This is a good thing.

Wherever you are, find the closest NPR station and listen.  There is only the bias provided by actual facts and there is so much more than that.  You can also expect to be entertained and moved and challenged. Let this happen and enjoy the experience.

Thanks for reading.  I'll try to do better next time.